Saturday, August 9, 2014

A Very Lovely Life

This past week, I had a pretty cool experience. You may not know this, but I have an Etsy shop where I sell vintage - specifically vintage linens. I actually reserved the shop name back in 2009, but didn't actually start selling until late 2011. When I started, my focus was vintage kitchenware, like Pyrex. But pretty soon, I started to become interested in old sheets. I just love the patterns and colors on vintage sheets, plus I love that "worn in" feeling. And when you ship sheets, there's no chance they'll arrive broken because the USPS guy kicked them over a fence. :)

My favorite way to use vintage sheets is in what I call a "remixed" set - it's really hard to find a complete vintage set with no missing pieces, so I take the "orphans" and put them together to create a set where each piece coordinates with each other, but doesn't necessarily match. I love seeing the different patterns together - I think it gives the set the feeling that it was collected over time.

So, a few months ago, I was approached on Etsy by Jann Jones, the craft editor for the magazine "Mollie Makes": a UK magazine that has recently come to the US. She told me that the magazine would like to feature my vintage remixed sheet sets in their upcoming September issue and asked if I'd send her a picture. Um.....yeah? I sent the picture on, but honestly didn't think much of it and assumed I'd never see it actually happen.

Last week, I'm in Target, and I see "Mollie Makes" in the periodical section. I flipped through it and, lo and behold, there I am! Page 40! Not gonna lie, there was a lot of shrieking and I think I scared some Target customers. I know it's not the front page of Better Homes and Gardens or anything, but it was pretty dang exciting!   

that's meeeeee!!
It's weird to have your guest bed pictured in a national magazine.

Anyhow, it will be fun to see if this goes anywhere! I've seen an increase in "views", meaning more people are looking at my shop. My sales have stayed pretty much the same, so I guess I won't be quitting my teaching job to run the sheet biz. :) But hey, if you're cleaning out Grandma's closet and you come across her sheets, hit me up! I'll gladly buy them from ya!

Monday, August 4, 2014

Here's your sign

So, last week, I celebrated my birthday. I'm 34. I have a friend who has “stuck” at 29 – she refuses to turn 30. Every year, she just says “I'm turning 29 again”. I think this year will be her 5h time as a 29 year old. Not me, man. Personally, I like my 30's. Your 20's are, frankly, kinda rough! You have to graduate from college and figure out what the heck you're going to do for money. You have to figure out health insurance and whether or not you're a dependent anymore. You're probably dating, which means blind dates and first dates and, worst of all, being set up with some dude who works with a friend of your moms friend's cousin and starts the date by telling you his frat brothers nick-named him “The Donkey” because of the size of his, um, manhood. TRUE STORY, FOLKS.

So, all in all, I like my 30's! However, I'm starting to feel less like a teenager and more like a mom. Yikes.

Signs you're getting older:

1. You are excited when a new store opens, only to find that you are too old to shop there. I'm looking at you, Urban Outfitters. We recently got one in Knoxville and the first time I went in, I was like, “Oh. This place is for teenagers.” It may as well have been a Gymboree - nothing in there was for my age group.

Perfect first day of school outfit, right? Maybe when I was a 6th grader back in 1990.

Not you, Forever 21. I don't care how old I am, cheap sunglasses are my spirit animal.

2. The people in charge of your kids seem like kids themselves. My friend (actually, the same friend who is still 29) recently dropped her kids off at day camp. She filled out the medical form and asked the teenager working the desk where to hand it in, to which the teen replied that she could give it to the nurse. My friend looked around and, seeing no nurse, asked again for clarification. The teenager then pointed to the girl sitting right next to her, who, according to my friend, looked about 13, and said “This is the nurse!”. Yikes.

3. Cute college boys now look at you like you're their mother. The other night, we were walking by the river and passed a group of young guys. One of them approached us and asked if we could take their picture. Right as I'm agreeing to it, a girl their age runs by, and no joke, the kid could not abandon me fast enough. Funny thing is, I totally thought all these kids were in about 9th grade, but Russell pointed out to me that they're probably college freshmen at orientation. Oh my lord.

4. Everyone calls me “ma'am”. The waiter. Guy who sprays our house for bugs. The Starbucks guy. It's unsettling when I'm all “wassup, bro” (on the inside. I don't actually say that out loud) and he's all “Ma'am, you can't park your power scooter here. Can I help you with your walker, ma'am?”

5. We had some big storms the other night and my knee throbbed so much, it woke me up. I've become one of those people that says things like, “Must be fixin' to rain, 'cause my knee's been singin' all day!" Yuck.

6. When we first got married, Russell and I talked about stuff like what's for dinner or what's happening on LOST tonight or how much it would cost to put a pool in the attic. Now, we talk about 529s and 401ks and making a will and saving for college. Remind me why 9 year old me thought growing up was cool? 

The scariest part of all of this is not the act of aging. It's the realization that we are the grown ups. Us. I still laugh at fart jokes. And carry cherry chapstick instead of lip stick. I'd rather re-read Harry Potter for the 12th time than watch a documentary. If no one was watching, I could go without eating my vegetables for days. The other day, I bought grape flavored Big League Chew (which, incidentally, I do NOT feel bad about because, duh, it's amazing.) 
Yeah, I play in the big leagues.

But at the same time, I'm almost old enough to run for President. PRESIDENT. By my age, Michaelangelo had completed the Sistine Chapel. Edison had invented the phonograph. And I still don't know how to curl the hair on the back of my head. Sigh.

This week in baby-dom:
How old is Claire?: 16 weeks! I can't believe it!

How Claire is eating: Pretty well. She went on a bit of a “breastfeeding strike”, the little union worker, but she got over it in about 24 hours.

How Claire is sleeping: Oh, not at all! So, here's a little gem they don't tell you when you're picking out sweet baby blankets and dreaming of nursery paint colors: your baby's a little jerk. Seriously. They'll fool you by sleeping through the night and then, just when you're starting to feel a little human, BAM. Asleep at 8. Up at 11. Back to sleep at 11:30. Up at 1. Down at 2. Up at 6, for the DAY. Naps? Psh, naps are for CHUMPS now.
"Mother, really. This again?"
How much Claire weighs: Around 12 pounds.

How much weight I've lost: Do you know the sad part about this statistic? I have to do the math every. Single. Time. With a calculator. THAT'S HOW BAD I AM AT MATH. Anyhow, I've lost 38 pounds. 10 to go!

How Russell's doing: Well, Russell is back at work full time, which is an adjustment for all of us, but so far it's going well. Claire is such a daddy's girl, so she's super excited when he gets home every day, which is precious. 

Milestones this week: Claire had her first big laughs this week. :) She's made laughing sounds before, but never in response to something funny. This week, we had genuine laughter. ADORABLE. I'm working on uploading a video, but that requires patience and some kind of internet magic I don't possess.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

All Apologies

What's the phrase that ends " ________________ is never having to say you're sorry"?  I'm pretty sure it's not "parenting". "Parenting" means having to say you're sorry to everyone: friends, family, strangers. Well, you don't HAVE to say you're sorry, but when you've inadvertently flashed a boob at a crowd of homeschooling nuns (okay, that didn't happen) or walked into the men's bathroom (that did...) , maybe you should. Here's the short list of people I owe an apology to...
  1. Everyone who has emailed, texted, facebook messaged, carrier pigeoned me in the last 3 months that I have not responded to. I'm sorry. It's not you, it's me. Most likely, I read your message on my phone at 4 AM and promptly forgot about it. Was it important? If so, send it again, okay? I'll try to read it when I'm more awake, so.....roughly 18 years from now.
  1. To the guy in the Earthfare bathroom who I totally walked in on whilst trying to tell my husband that there is no extra outfit in the diaper bag and he's just going to have to change her diaper, take her outfit off (now covered in poop), and carry her out naked: my apologies. You probably thought you had the place to yourself and then in burst 2 irritated gingers: one frustrated and one screaming, covered in feces. (I'll let you, the reader, work out which was Russell). Anyhow, dude, I'm super sorry. I don't make it a habit to walk into the public men's bathroom.
  2. To the usher at the wedding last weekend, who I basically verbally assaulted so he'd get out of my way as I tried to hustle my baby to a window to distract her so she wouldn't completely lose her cool all over someone's wedding: so sorry. I know it was your job to stop people from going back there. But trust me, unless you wanted to see the complete shit show that is my baby when she's hungry, it was best that I get to the window pronto to appease her.  Also, I'm sorry for the eye-rolling when you yelled after me “Well, don't go in any of those rooms!!” Trust me, unless those rooms contained a bouncy seat and Baby Einstein on a loop, I wasn't going in them.
  1. To everyone who's tried to have meaningful conversation with me and gotten nothing in return: I'm so sorry. I have nothing to give. By the end of most days, the most exciting thing that's happened to me is either Claire's bowel movements or something to do with Real Housewives. Someday, I really hope to come back to the real world and have adult conversation.
     5. To everyone who has run into me in public: first off, I hope I said hello, at the very least. I am    so rarely alone these days that when I am, I find myself in some kind of parenting-induced trance, wandering the aisles of Target. So, I apologize if I didn't see you or looked right at you with no hint of recognition on my face. I also apologize if you tried to talk to me and I could barely form a sentence. See #4.

This week in baby-dom:
How old is Claire?: 13 weeks
13 weeks of sass

How Claire is eating: Just fine! We continue to do a combination of 80% breast milk, 18% formula, 2% bourbon. Just kidding! 3% bourbon.
"Knob Creek, Single Barrel please. On the rocks."

How Claire is sleeping: The bourbon has really helped with the sleeping! JUST KIDDING. Sheesh. But really, Claire sleeps pretty darn well – usually a good long stretch from about 10 pm til 4 am and then another short stretch from 5 am til 7 or 8.

Update on the harness: We are DONE with the harness!!! Praise the Lord, we are done. Claire had a check up with her orthopedist and he pronounced her “good as gold”. We'll go back in 6 months for x-rays, but NO MORE HARNESS. As much as I want to burn it (and I reeeeaaalllly want to burn it), I'm going to wash it and put it away, because I'm sure it will be one of those “Oh I can't believe you were this tiny!” things. In about 20 years.

How much Claire weighs: Not sure, but we're guessing between 11 and 12 pounds.

This is probably my 2nd selfie ever.
How much weight I've lost: After a few weeks of stalemate, my scale finally moved this week – I'm now down 37 pounds. 12 to go (to be back at my pre-pregnancy weight). I got some nasty motivation the other day at Target – I decided I had to purchase shorts, no matter the size, or I would cook in this hot Tennessee summer. I won't tell you the size I had to purchase, but let's just say it's a size that's never been on my body. Ouch. Also, nothing like a 3 way mirror to smack that Hershey's bar out of your pudgy little hands.

How Russell's doing: Russell started band camp this week (all my northern relatives who go back to school after Labor Day are shocked and appalled by this), so he's pretty tired. I also gave him an early birthday present: a jogging stroller. Russell's become quite the runner, so we're both excited that he'll be able to take Claire along for the fun. :)

Milestones this week: Claire is starting to be interested in some toys - she doesn't reach out and grab them, but if I put one in her hand, she'll play with it a bit. Well, she'll try to stuff it in her mouth. That counts as playing, right? We've been trying to do more "tummy time" (ugh, what an obnoxious phrase), but she HATES it. Maybe because it's called "tummy time".
"Tummy time's the worst."

Thursday, June 19, 2014

What's a pirate's favorite life saving technique?

 C.P. ARRRRRR, of course! :)


So, it's official: I'm that girl. The one who has a baby and then all she can talk about is her baby and every picture on her phone is of that baby and baby baby baby.

I didn't mean for this to happen. I'm not even gonna lie to you: before I had one of my own, I was a little judgey about “that girl”. I was all, “how sad that she has nothing else in her life to talk about” and “if I end up like that, please punch me in the face a little.”

Well, I'm due for a face punching. It's just that I have no life. I'm not working. It's summer so the pace of life is pretty slow. And I have an 10 pound weight that keeps me pretty well tied down to the house. When I do leave the house, it's usually to go hang out with other people who have babies. Guess what we talk about. :)

The other day, Russell and I left Claire with my parents for the first time so we could attend an infant CPR class. In hindsight, NOT our best choice. We walk in the room and see another couple sitting at some long tables that are covered in these:
Um, I know why it's not's face is covered in plastic wrap. Class dismissed!
BTW, I tried super hard to take a selfie with my dead baby look alike, but turns out there is not an appropriate time to do that during your Infant CPR class. At least not without looking like a total weirdo.

So then, we start watching the video in which the first scene is a baby who stops breathing in her crib. Russell and I just looked at each other like, “this was a baaaaaad idea”. The next scene: a baby choking. And from there on, who knows, because all I could do was obsessively check my phone and freak out over how my baby was home alone with people who hadn't watched a baby in 30 YEARS.
What I learned: infants are bad at CPR.
It all worked out fine and we did end up learning Infant CPR and the Heimlich. Just in case you're a little rusty, let me give you a quick CPR review:

Step One: “Check the area to make sure everything is safe.” Russell and I didn't quite get this step. On the video, the lady just looked to the right and the left. But I guess you're supposed to glance around to make sure the buffalo are done stampeding or there are no tsunamis on the horizon.

Step Two: “Try to get the baby to react.” In the class, we did this by tapping the baby's foot and yelling “BABY! BABY!” Awkward. In real life, you can just shout the baby's name. Or whatever else gets your baby to react – political injustice, the death penalty, the war on women, whatever. #yesallbabies

Step Three: “Begin chest compressions.” Using two fingers, right below the nipple line (which is super hard to find on your dead baby look alike, fyi), press down 30 times into the baby's chest about an inch and a half. Our instructor recommended we compress to the beat of Michael Jackson's “Stayin' Alive”. Yup. You read that right. Also, you've got to really dig in there. Don't be shy about those compressions. You're gonna feel like you're breaking baby's ribs, but guess what's worse than broken ribs? Being dead. #toughlove

Step Four: Put your mouth over baby's nose and mouth and give 3 breaths. You're going to feel (and look) like you're eating baby's face. Roll with it. When I was doing this part in class, the teacher walked by and said “Oh, you're doing so good. You're a natural!” Super. I'm a natural at fitting your baby's head in my mouth. #partytricks #hashtagsarestupid

Step Five: Repeat this process 5 times and then call 911. In class, we had to show this by picking baby up and announcing to the room “Now I will call 911!”, which made me giggle inappropriately every time. Just so you know, if this were to ever happen to me, I'd totally be calling 911 FIRST, not last. What can I say, I'm a rule breaker.

This week in baby-dom:
How old is Claire?: 9 weeks

How Claire is eating: Here's a nasty effect of adding formula to your baby's diet: constipation. Now, it's not really constipation as she's still doing the deed; she's just doing it less often and when it happens, watch out. POOPMAGEDDON. That crap (literally) is everywhere. We also switched almost totally to cloth diapers this week, which we love, except when I have to put the POOPMAGEDDON into my washer. Ew.
This. Right here. Is my. Poopface.

How Claire is sleeping: Um, like a boss!! Claire is finally sleeping for a good long stretch at night – about 10 pm til 4 or 5 am. Not every night, but most, which sure makes a difference in my mood! :)

Update on the harness: Starting this week, we'll go to our final step with the harness: wearing it 6 hours a day. Basically, during her long stretch of sleep. 3 more weeks of that and then DONE!

How much Claire weighs:10lbs, 13 oz
10 lbs 13 oz of cuteness
How much weight I've lost: Oh this stupid stat and my need for full disclosure. Sigh. Well, I did lose 1 more pound this week, which is good. You know what sucks about weight loss? Well, everything, but what I was referencing was how dang slow it goes. I'm all “I had a banana for breakfast and ran .0002 of a mile. Pretty sure I should be skinny now.” Too bad that's not how it works, right?

How Russell's doing: Russell celebrated his first Father's Day last Sunday with lunch out, some new Keens, and one of those fancy water hoses that they show on infommercials. Basically the trifecta of good Father's Day presents.

"I am a Jedi, like my father before me"

Milestones this week: I read Claire's first book to her: “Pat the Bunny”. She cried at the end, presumably because she's a huge advocate for animal rights. Or, because she was hungry. Whatever.

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

This week, in reality and reality TV

 Well, it's been a big week at 'ole McCurdy Manor, because (drum roll please)......


Or is it the rabbit? The ninja? Shoot, I can't remember now. It's the fancy cable where I can record like 5 shows at once AND watch stuff on the DVR in our bedroom. Formerly, we could only watch DVR shows in the living room.

It's a pretty big deal folks.

This means a few things.

  1. Russell and I will basically never see each other again, except to pass the baby off.
  1. I'm at a place in my life where I really feel like I finally have room to open myself up to new people. By people I mean housewives. And by housewives, I mean real ones. Of New York City to be specific, 'cause of course I already watch Real Housewives of Orange County. I mean, the DVR now records 5 SHOWS AT ONE TIME. I'd be a fool not to!
See, I have HORRIBLE taste in TV. And this whole “stay at home mom” thing is not helping. The TV is on pretty much all day and since I'm breastfeeding, I spend a lot of time sitting in front of it. So, just in case you don't have the Rabbit Ninja, let me catch you up on what you've missed in reality. Reality TV that is.
  1. The Dugger's have 19 kids. They had 20, but the last one died and it was possibly the worst thing you can watch when you have a 2 week old baby, so watch out for that. 2 of their older girls are in “courtships” which is their word for dating. It means they get to go on dates, but only with a chaperone. Oh, and only side hugs are allowed in courtship. All that crazy aside, I kind of love the Duggers and all 19 of their herd. Sidenote- if there was a 19 Kids and Counting drinking game, it would be this: drink everytime a Dugger says “special”. As in, “It was just really special when I got to see my boyfriend and give him a side hug, all while my sister watched."
  2. Tori Spelling got cheated on by her husband and then filmed, like, 3 solid weeks of them fighting. It is an absolute train wreck and I didn't miss a single episode, even the “reunion” where said husband (Something McDermott? He's famous....for something...) showed his love for Tori by tattooing their wedding vows on his ribcage. Oh, and singing a pretty awful song. #TELEVISIONGOLD
  3. As I mentioned above, I currently watch the Real Housewives of Orange County. There used to be 5ish of them: 4 idiots and 1 intelligent woman. I felt super bad for the smart girl, except not really, 'cause she gets paid to hang out with the idiots. Now, they fired a couple idiots, and added another smart girl, so the first smart girl has a friend she can talk to using words with more than 3 syllables. I believe the last episode involved a chick paying her dentist to put magic crystals in her teeth, you know, for feng shui. I can't make this shit up.
  4. Lastly, there's the Long Island Medium. You'll probably think I'm a real idiot when I say this, but I totally believe she's the real deal. However, before you start saving your pennies for your own personal reading, let me just tell you what she'll say, since she says the same thing to everyone: Your loved one is at peace and they're super proud of you and whenever you feel your hair stand on end for any reason, blame it on dead grama/aunt/dad/cousin Frankie.

Alright, now you all know my dirty, dirty TV habits. We all have them, so put the gavel down, Judge Judy. (By the way, Russell has walked by as I type this and informs me it's the "Genie". Personally, I like "Rabbit" more.)

This week in baby-dom:
How old is Claire?: 8 weeks

How Claire is eating: Well, we have a bit of a “supply vs. demand” situation currently: Claire demands and I just can't supply enough. So, we've starting supplementing once a day with formula. It was a hard decision. You know how the media has talked about “slut-shaming”? Well, there's definitely “formula-shaming” in baby world. But my motto is “you do what you have to do” and Claire just needs more than I can provide right now. I did, maniacally, research every formula under the SUN before choosing one. I'm still a neurotic, terrified, first time mom after all.

How Claire is sleeping: Claire is finally starting to sleep for a good stretch of time at night. We can pretty much count on 4-5 hours of sleep which is GLORIOUS. Last night, she even slept from 10:30 til 5 AM!

Update on the harness: She's only wearing the harness to sleep (from about 9 pm til 9 am) and doing generally well with it. 8 out of 10 times, she screams while we put it on, which is great because I've always found that it's easier to do a task when someone's screaming in your face. :)
This picture sums up my life right now

How much Claire weighs: We had to pop in to the pediatrician last week to check a little spot on her belly button and the scale there said 9 lbs, 13 oz. So, Ye Olde Bathroom Scale is a LIAR, as it said she weighed 10 pounds a week prior.

How much weight I've lost: I'm still stuck at -30 pounds. Russell and I have been walking every day and I attempted a teensy bit of running. It's amazing how big of a role your abdominal muscles play in basic exercise. I also took a Zumba class at my friend Kat's church which reminded me how incredibly out of shape I am :)

How Russell's doing: Currently, the only way Claire will fall asleep at night is laying on Russell's chest, so he's loving that!

Milestones this week: Claire had her first escalator ride, shortly followed by one of her first elevator rides after we saw the sign reading “no wheeled vehicles on the escalator”. Oops. 
Hi, I'm adorable.

Monday, June 2, 2014

7 Week Update

Hello world! Long time, no see, eh? Sorry it's been radio silence on my end for a few weeks now -turns out, having a newborn is time consuming. Who knew? Actually, I'll let you in on a little secret only us new parents know:

the first 6 weeks of your baby's life are freaking awful.

There, I said it. They're AWFUL. I know, I'm supposed to talk about the joy of motherhood and my precious bundle and how every moment is a new blessing. And it is. But DAMN, that is hard to remember when you've been up til 4 am for 3 nights running with a screaming baby who only wants to eat. And then spit up. And then poop on you, the bed, the nightgown, the god-forsaken harness, and everything else in sight. And everyone you see says, with a big smile on their face and surprise in their voice, “Wow, you look tired!”.


The good news is, Claire is 7 weeks old today! And we're starting to see the light! We're figuring her out and she's figuring out things like “how hands work”. It's lovely. She's sleeping better and starting to be a little less grouchy, especially in the morning. She's still pooping on any and everything, but I'm starting to care less.
Rockin' the harness at 5 weeks

Also, she's cute as hell and I'm crazy about her. Even at 4 AM!

This week in baby-dom:
How old is Claire?: 7 weeks!

How Claire is eating: Claire takes after me, meaning that she could eat all day, every day, and be totally happy. Russell continues to get up for the first feeding, usually around 2 AM, so we're both getting a decent chunk of sleep, which is awesome.

How Claire is sleeping: She goes down about 10:30 – in her crib. Back up from around 2:00-2:45, takes a bottle from Russell, then back to the crib. Up again between 4:45 and 5:30 --- my turn to feed her, then back to the crib until around 6:30 or 7:00. After that, it's hit or miss. Sometimes I can stick her in her bouncer, which we call the “Shakey Seat”, in between us on the bed, and she'll sleep for another couple hours. Sometimes, we're just up with the sun. :)

Update on the harness: We had an ultrasound at Children's Hospital last week (where a very judgey nurse made me feel bad that Claire doesn't take a pacifier. Sorry, nursey, she just doesn't. You try to reason with a 6 week old) which showed that Claire's hips are perfect! We got to FINALLY take the harness off on Thursday. It was wonderful! Claire had her first tub bath (which she hated), her first swaddling since the hospital, and (most importantly, ha!) got to wear her first pants!! Now, she only has to wear the harness at night for 3 more weeks, then 6 hours a day for 3 weeks, then DONE.
I got 99 problems but a harness ain't one

How much Claire weighs: About 10 pounds, according to Ye Olde Bathroom Scale.

How much weight I've lost: So far, I've lost 30 pounds of the 48 I gained. 18 pounds to go to get back to my pre-prego weight, which honestly, was the most I've ever weighed. Sooooo....maybe some more work after that :) I'm part of a Postpartum support group on facebook and we all did a weight loss challenge in May, which really helped me. This month, I'm doing a DietBet with the same group. In case you've never heard of that, DietBet is a website where you basically bet a small sum of money that you can lose 4% of your body weight in 28 days. If you lose it, you split the pot with the other winners. If you don't lose the weight, you lose the money. So, I'm hoping the threat of losing my hard earned $20.00 will stop me from eating my weight in biscuits.

C-section recovery: Well, I went to the doctor last week and he cleared me for all activities, which made me both happy and terrified. C-section ladies know what I'm talking about here. Yikes. I will NOT be updating y'all on how ALL activities are going, but let's just say that I think it's best to take it slooooooow.

I'm talking about running, of course.
How Russell's doing: Well, he's tired, of course. Other than that, I think he's doing really, really well. He's really good with Claire – she LOVES him and smiles for him more than anyone! He's also much braver and more confident than I am – he's ready to take her out and about and I'm like, “let's just be hermits FOREVER”. He's also really good at entertaining her. I've basically got 2 tricks up my sleeve (more like down my blouse, AMIRIGHT?), but he's always thinking up new ways to keep a newborn happy.

Came home from the store to find my daughter watching sports
Milestones this week: Claire went to church for the first time last week! We visited the church I grew up in – Erin Presbyterian. She chilled in the car seat until the sermon started: then she screamed bloody murder. This week, we went to Powell Pres. (our current church, where I'm the musical minister). She made it through “Welcome to church this Sunday!” before the screaming started. Ironically, the only part of the service she didn't scream through was when the choir sang! That's my girl!!

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

A farewell to pants. Maternity pants that is

You may recall when I first outgrew normal pants. I wrote about it here. It was then that I was introduced to the wonderful world of maternity pants and bade farewell to nuisances such as zippers and buttons. I eventually outgrew that first pair of maternity jeans and went on to a larger pair I found at a thrift store. A beautiful marriage between sweat pants and jeans, they served me well. I never had to worry if my fly was down, since I didn't have one. I never dealt with “muffin top”, since my huge elastic pants went from my crotch to my boobs. And my maternity jeans never dug into my stomach leaving a judgey little red imprint where the button had been.

This week marked an important milestone: my return to regular pants. Now, let's not get crazy: these are not my pre-pregnancy pants. They're some jeans that a friend gave me specifically for after my c-section because they're 2 sizes too big. Or, they would have been before I got pregnant. Now, they barely zip. Damn you, bagels of days gone by!!

Anyhow, to commemorate this occasion: a haiku.

Goodbye preggers jeans

Elastic waist, no judgement

Hidden muffin top

This week:

How old is Claire?: 3 weeks

3 weeks old!
How Claire is eating: This week we introduced the bottle in hopes that Russell could take over 1 of the 3 overnight feedings. Claire took to it immediately and, thank you Jesus, has no problem going back and forth between the boob and the bottle. This means that I get to sleep for a luxurious 4 hours at a time!! Before having a baby, that sentence would have sounded crazy to me.

How Claire is sleeping: After a couple weeks of trial and error, we're starting to figure this one out. For now at least. Claire's actually been sleeping in her crib. It's funny- the crib is the last place we considered. For people my parents age, it was probably the only option, but after reading umpteen parenting books and the entire internet, we were convinced that she'd either need to sleep in some kind of cradle in our room or she'd sleep in our bed. We tried both of those (plus many other options), and then finally, in exhaustion, gave up and tried to the crib. And it worked! Now, it doesn't work every time, but usually she's in there at least half the night.

4 AM party at my house!
Update on the harness: Great news on the harness front this week! We went to KOC to see Dr. Crawford and he told us that Claire's hips “want to stay in socket”, which of course, is the goal. He said that if we were the kind of people who celebrated over a bottle of wine, that night was a good excuse! We are SO happy and SO relieved. We have 3 more weeks of 24/7 harness time, then an ultrasound which will hopefully show more progress, and after that..... WE GET TO TAKE THE HARNESS OFF FOR 12 HOURS A DAY. Praise Jesus. Seriously.

How much weight Claire's gained: Now, we're just weighing her using the scale in our bathroom, so this may not be accurate, but Ye Olde Bathroom Scale says Claire weighs 8 lbs, 8 oz (including the harness of course). Funny, she's nearly a month old and still doesn't weigh as much as I did AT BIRTH. Y'all, I told you I was big, but I didn't tell you I was actually the biggest baby in the hospital. I was so damn big, they used me for a bathing demonstration because I was visible from the back of the room. VISIBLE FROM THE BACK OF THE ROOM. My poor, tiny mom....


How much weight I've lost: Ha! Speaking of visible from the back of the room.....more like, visible from the Mars Rover. :) Actually, I can't complain because the weight really is coming off. It's starting to come off a bit slower, but I'm steadily losing. Currently, I've lost 25 pounds (of the 48 I gained).

C-section recovery: Going well! I'm off all the pain medication and just a little sore. Russell and I took the baby to World's Fair Park most days this week for a walk, and I could go a little farther each day, which was encouraging. Warning, this sentence is about to get gross, so if you're a boy or easily offended, avert yo eyes – I'm still dealing with some bleeding, which I notice gets heavier if I've walked a lot the previous day. Dr. Google says this can last up to 6 weeks, so I'm not worried – it's more annoying at this point.

Milestones this week: Claire went to her first party (Happy Birthday, Bethany!!) and we celebrated my first Mother's Day with Claire's first lunch in a restaurant. Lots of firsts!
My neighbor (who happens to own the best bakery  in town) brought us a Mother's Day cake!! Best neighbors ever!